Stream of Consciousness Saturday (July 26)

I’m late (again) I know… That’s two days in a row and that’s not like me at all! I’ll get it together, I promise…

It’s been a very long day; traveling all the way up to the North Country in New York for my cousin’s baby shower. My theory is that as long as I post before the day ends on the West Coast, I’m okay!

This week’s topic for SOCSΒ is a “free-for-all” basically. I’m pretty excited about that. My whole life is pretty much a free-for-all. But. You have to end the post with a question!

Driving all day has provided me a lot of time to think about things. Since we were driving to a baby shower, naturally, thoughts of perhaps having a child of my own someday began…and it scared me. I’ll be 22 on the 3rd and so I’m still WAY TOO YOUNG to be thinking about this, but I just couldn’t help it.Β 

I’d always said that I would not have children. Ever. Nope, no way. And for the most part, I still feel that way. I’m pretty selfish–most times I think about myself and nobody else before I go and do something. I gave a year of my life to something bigger than myself to somewhat make up for that selfishness. I still feel that I’m not as selfless as I should be. You have to be selfless to be able to raise a child and have a family. I just don’t think I could.Β 

Maybe someday I’ll get over that and be able to have a child and a family of my own. But that day won’t come for a long, long time… But who knows?

11 thoughts on “Stream of Consciousness Saturday (July 26)

  1. I agree, if it’s not the end of the day on the West Coast, you’re fine! πŸ™‚ As for having kids, I’ve felt like you most of my life, and am now in my 30s and still childless. So far, no regrets over it…but some of my friends who are more undecided say the problem is, what if we change our minds later, once it’s too late to have one biologically? I say there’s always adoption (which I’d lean towards anyway since I think it’s such a great thing to do). But besides that, I can’t have a kid now just because I MIGHT regret not doing it later on. That would be like having a full meal now when I’m not hungry, just because I might be later. To me, that’s not a good reason to bring a child into this world. So, don’t worry too much — go with your gut. For the record though, in case I sound anti-kid (I’m not!), I have heard people say they too felt too self-focused to have kids, but once they had them that changed. So do with that what you will. πŸ™‚ Anyway, great post!

    1. Thank you! I think it’s great that you’re sticking to your guns and not having kids just because someone says you may regret it later. Only you know what can make you happy. πŸ™‚

  2. Take your time! When and if the time is right, you’ll know it. I admit, I hated kids before I had mine – I started when I was 30 and had 3 and now of course I love them and all children. Those selfish years are very important for you. So often I see people having kids before they’ve fully lived and they end up resenting their children. The ones who really suffer are the children themselves.
    Anyway, that’s my two cents. Thanks so much for participating in SoCS! πŸ˜€

    1. Thank you! I definitely think I’m at a point in my life where I’m ready to focus on my career and get that completely together before I start making any sort of family planning decisions.

      I’m really glad to be a part of SOCS; it’s one of the highlights of my week every week! I’m looking forward to designing my version of the new SOCS badge!

      1. Focusing on your career is an excellent idea. Kids definitely tend to put those sorts of things on hold for years.

        I think I may try to get my head wrapped around the SoCS badge contest thing next week. πŸ™‚ I’m so glad you’re enjoying it!

  3. Thoughtful post! I’m in my forties with no kids…my husband and I just never felt strongly that we should be parents! You’re right that you’ve got a lot of time to think about this πŸ™‚ Just don’t consider yourself to be selfish for not wanting kids. There are lots of selfish people in the world, with and without kids. It’s just as selfish to want kids in order to have someone to take care of you when you’re old as it is to not want them at all! I think people should have children because they have a passion and a desire to raise them! I believe God gives each of us the exact number of children that we are supposed to have. For me,that was zero πŸ™‚

    1. Thank you! As long as you’re happy, that is what matters. I’m glad that there’s someone else in the world that’s just as content without kids as there are with kids. Besides, you have good friends to take care of you when you’re old! πŸ™‚

  4. I agree with the other two ladies: go with your gut. You will know when the time is right and if not, then not. I am 44 this year and said to my granddad at my 18th birthday: I will have children with 20 or I won’t have any. I don’t have kids of my own but two brilliant step-kids and I am loving how my life goes. Never really regretted it. I needed to sort things out in my life and children at that time would only have suffered terribly. Life has a tendency to sort itself out. You will see πŸ™‚

    1. Thank you! Right now is definitely not the right time–I’m just about to start my new and really awesome job with the federal government and so it’s just not in the cards! (That and there’s no significant other in the picture as of yet!)

      1. Ah, congratulations and well nowadays you don’t necessarily need a significant other to have children :-). Good luck to you and enjoy your new job!

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